Solutions for overcoming social anxiety, fears and shyness!!!


Social phobia is a disorder that is characterized by irrational fear of people and social situations.

In fact, people with this disorder are afraid of situations where others can watch or may offended them. It is the fear of appearances in which the symptoms are much more pronounced than when it comes to the normal jitters or nervousness before the appearance on the public scene. Social phobia usually occurs after puberty and peaks reaching beyond the age of 30. A most social phobia is evident between the ages of 20 and 35 years so that it can ruin the best years of life.

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The causes of the social phobia

According to behavioral hypotheses, phobic symptoms are the result of conditioning and abnormal cognition characterized as “fear of negative evaluation” and “prejudice that other people will be overly critical towards them.”

Fear of negative evaluation” have especially mothers when they have a fear that their children may be neglected  so they often have over – protected attitude (that kind of attitude leads to an anxiety disorder).

Biological theories explain the formation of social phobia disorder as a function of neurotransmitter receptors in the brain and neuroendocrine deviations.

Symptoms of social phobia

 – The fear of public speaking.

– Avoidance of certain social situations.

 – The fear of sweating, flushing, fainting in a particular society.

 – Feelings of confusion before the other, unknown people / authorities / certain types of people

 – Fear not of dropping the silly, goofy, messy.

 – Discomfort when a person is observed.

 – Fear that something works, shows, performed in front of others, eating.

 – The fear of possible criticism.

 – Fear of possible outliers from the company.

 – Intense mental activity in order to avoid a potentially embarrassing social situations.

Social phobia can ruin the best years of life, don’t let that happen to you.

If you are shy and prone to social anxiety, here are some tips that may be helpful.

Treatment of social phobia No. 1: Review the negative beliefs

Those who suffer from social phobia often have negative beliefs and beliefs that contribute to their anxiety. If you have a social phobia, you can be overwhelmed by these thoughts:

 – “I know that I’ll look like a fool.”

 – “My voice starts to tremble and I will be humbled.”

 – “People will think I’m stupid.”

 – “I have nothing to say. I’ll be boring to others “

Revisiting these negative beliefs through therapy or self-reflection, an effective way to reduce the symptoms of social phobia.

The first step is to recognize automatic negative beliefs that are essentially the fear of social situations. For example, if you are concerned about the business presentation that is approaching, the certificate may be: “I’ll ruin something. Everyone will think I’m completely incompetent. “

The next step involves analyzing and provoking beliefs. It is useful to ask yourself the following questions about the negative beliefs: “Do you know for sure that they ruin your presentation?” Or “Even though I’m nervous if people will inevitably think I’m incompetent?”. Through such a logical analysis of your negative thoughts, you can gradually replace them with more realistic and positive views on social situations that trigger your anxiety.

It is especially important to check do you have any of the following thinking ways:

 – Reading minds: the assumption that we know what other people think, and to be seen in the same negative way as you see yourself.

 – Self-fulfilling prophecy: Predicting the future anticipation of the worst possible outcomes. Conviction that things will go wrong, so you are more anxious and before he followed this situation.

 – Catastrophize: Exaggeration past proportions. If people notice that you are nervous, it will be “terrible”, “horrible” or “disastrous”.

 – Personalization: Assuming that people focus on you in a negative way, or that their behavior has to do with you.

Treatment of social phobia No. 2: Learn to control your breathing

Many changes are taking place in your body when you become anxious. One of the first changes is that you start to breathe rapidly. Gasp disturbs the balance of oxygen and carbon dioxide in your body leading to extra-physical symptoms of anxiety, such as dizziness, feeling that you are going to suffocate, rapid heartbeat and muscular tension.

Learning to slow down your breathing, you can regain control of their physical symptoms of anxiety. The application of the following breathing exercises will help you to stay calm when you enter the center of attention.

Breathing exercises that maintain composure in social situations

 – Sit comfortably with your back straight and shoulders relaxed. Put one hand on the chest and the other on your stomach.

 – Breathe slowly and deeply through your nose for 4 seconds. Fist in your stomach should be raised, while the hand on your chest should move very little.

 – Hold your breath for 2 seconds.

 – Breathe out slowly through your mouth for 6 seconds, cutting out as much air. Fist in your stomach should get closer as you exhale, your fists on his chest would again need to move very little.

 – Continue to breathe in through your nose and exhale through the mouth. Focus on breathing to be slow and correct the regime 4 seconds to inhale, 2 seconds for the retention of breath and exhale for 6 seconds.

In addition to breathing exercises will help you and regularly practicing relaxation techniques such as meditation, yoga, progressive muscle relaxation, helping you to maintain control over the physical symptoms of anxiety.

Treatment of social phobia No. 3: Face your fears

One of the most useful things you can do in order to overcome the anxiety  or social phobia is to face with social situations that we would rather avoid. Avoiding maintains the sustainability of social phobia.

Avoiding leads as to additional problems

Avoiding unpleasant situations that will make you feel bad in social situations. In fact, the more you run away from frightening social situations, there will be more such terrible situations.

Avoidance may also prevent you from doing things you want or to reach certain goals. For example, fear of public exposure may prevent you share your ideas at work to perform in front of the class, or to form friendships.

For example, if you meeting  with foreigners seem anxious for you , you can join a friend who goes to a party. Once you have mastered this step, you can try to get to know a new person. And so on.

Coping with social phobia through the “stairs anxiety”
Even if you think it is impossible  to overcome the fear of social situations, you can do that step by step. The trick is to start with a situation that you can submit to gradually move towards increasingly demanding situations, building  confidence and skills to overcome the flow of climbing the so-called “anxiety stairs.”

For example, if you meeting  with foreigners seem anxious for you , you can join a friend who goes to a party. Once you have mastered this step, you can try to get to know a new person. And so on.
Do not try to face your greatest fears from the first attempt. It’s never a wise idea to stare too much, ask a lot of demands in front of you or force things. This will render failure and strengthen your anxiety.

 -Be patient. Overcoming social phobia takes time and practice. It is a gradual process step by step.

 -Use calming skills that you have learned, such as focusing on your breathing and questioning negative assumptions.

Treatment of social phobia No. 4: 

Actively search for and connect yourself with all social contexts is another effective way to overcome social phobia. The following suggestions are a good way to start interacting with others in a positive way:

 – Attend a course of social skills and assertiveness. These courses are often offered local adult education centers or in state educational institutions.

 – Volunteer doing something you enjoy, such as rescuing abandoned dogs or enveloping materials for the campaign-anything that will give you a sense of activity and focus, and where you will interact with a number of people related thinking.

 – Work on your communication skills. Good relations are based on a clear and emotionally intelligent communication. If you find that you have difficulty to get together with others, learning the basic skills of emotional intelligence can help.

Treatment of social phobia No. 5: Change your lifestyle

Although spontaneous life changes are not enough to overcome social phobia, they can strengthen your overall progress in treatment. The following interventions in the field of lifestyle can help to reduce overall levels of anxiety and prepare the ground for successful treatment:

 – Avoid or limit your intake of caffeine. Coffee, tea, caffeine mineral water, energy drinks and chocolate act as stimulants that increase anxiety symptoms.

 – Drink moderately. While you are tempted to drink something before a party or other social situation in order to relax, alcohol increases your risk of anxiety attacks.

 – Leave the cigarettes. Nicotine is a powerful stimulant. Smoking leads to higher levels of anxiety.

 – Sleep enough. When you are sleep deprived, you are more susceptible to anxiety.

 – Say to yourself :enough it’s enough

Persistence and exercise are the two most important element to overcome any anxiety disorder. The good news is that thousands of people overcome social anxiety and you will too, just believe in yourself.


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